I have mentioned in the past that I have issues with the fact that I always said what I wanted to be when I grew up was a mom. Plain and simple. It was my calling.
The thing is...no one ever mentioned that my kiddos will grow up. Yep. They grow up. What??!!!
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| Look how sweet they are?! So not fair!! |
Hmmmmmmm......................................
So I have been trying to figure out what's next and feeling a bit down about it.
I have talked to C and he gets it but he also doesn't get it. He likes that I am here for our kids. He likes what I provide our family. He is fine with whatever I want to do but he wants the kids to be the priority as do I.
What I don't think he gets though is my dissatisfaction. I don't get it either. What do I have to be dissatisfied about?
I always ask myself "What do you want to do/be?". I hate hearing myself say it. It sounds so spoiled, so entitled. Most people do whatever they need to do to make things work but I feel the need to figure out what I want to do. Does that make sense? I want to enjoy what I do. I want to feel fulfilled. I want to do something that enriches my life in some way.
Then it hit me...I am looking at this from the wrong angle. I need to look at it from my family's angle. What is it that I provide to them? I am lucky enough to provide everything for my family. I need to remember how important I am to my kids.
MY family needs me to be an AT-HOME mom.
That is it...my kids and my husband need me to do the job I have. Yes...I have a job...it's called Mom and I am really good at my job. I need to be proud of that! I really love my job. I truly believe it's what I was meant to be and isn't that what we all strive for...to be what we were meant to be?
So I guess I have been needlessly searching for something that I already have.
Perspective is such a good thing. I feel I can see things in a new light now and that feels good.
Maybe that would help everyone out there who can't seem to find satisfaction in what they do. Try to see it from the perspective of your employer...try to see what you provide them and that might bring a little more satisfaction.
You may not get a "Thank You" as often as you deserve but you must still remember your worth. My family couldn't do without me doing what I do. C could not do what I do nor would he want to...I couldn't do what he does and I definitely wouldn't want to. We are where we are suppose to be.
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| Ahhhhh! Love these guys! |
4 comments:
You are so right, perspective is everything! And you are great at your job. No harm, though, in thinking what comes next for you. Something will come along that feels just right and you will know it when it does. Love you, Lori
I agree! Love you, Donna
(from your 'other' sister)
You have this job down! Just like with everyone else, when you are good at your job, you look for the next challenge.
I've been thinking about that too. What will I teach them? Where will I take them? How will I meet their needs while they are still at home? How do I let go in a healthy way that supports their individuality? Now THAT is hard work!
Love you & your post.
Dad & I are so proud of the great Moms you & Lori are; but looking ahead to new challenges when kiddos are grown is healthy. Lori is right, the next direction for you will appear when the time is right. All Moms have this same challenge & all Moms are working Moms. If all could be full time like you, we'd have a healthier society. Keep up the good work. We love you so much.
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